Things I Wish I Would Have Known As a Newbie Femdom and Findom

I’ve been reflecting a bit lately about my journey in the Femdom world. The highs, the lows, the successes and the failures (yes, even strong dominant women can fail sometimes). I’d like to outline some things I have learned the hard way in this line of work, and maybe those who consider diving in into this work could learn from my own mistakes.

You don’t need to spend beyond your means to make yourself look more rich or successful. Most people who have large amounts of wealth do not spend it on unnecessary items only to flaunt their wealth anyway. I often made the mistake of feeling like I needed to acquire certain status symbols before taking care of other things in my life.

While, yes, there are women who do use these things as part of their persona, however those things are normally gifted and are at the point where their income is steady enough to accept such gifts from slaves. Those sorts of things aren’t that important to me as an individual, so doing this was not being true to myself. And if you’re not true to yourself, you won’t have much fun at this anyway.

Always have a back up plan. Most Dommes won’t admit it to risk the illusion they present, but sometimes things can get slow, especially if you do your work online. Diversify your income on different platforms and invest in other income stream opportunities.

I learned this one the hard way. If you are like me and would much prefer working for yourself, it’s a good thing to learn to be open to new business opportunities and invest in those for when times are slow with your Femdom business. Cultivating the ability to see new opportunities as an independent entrepreneur has saved my butt during slow times.

It’s OK to have high standards and take it slow. When I first began online Femdom, I dove right in. While passion is a good thing, I was so eager to have clients that I often lowered my standards just so I could build my business quickly. I sacrifice quality over quantity.

That worked well for a while until I burned out. I didn’t like the clients and atmosphere I had cultivated because I had taken the advice of others without getting clear about what I really wanted out of Femdom. Which leads me to my next thing….

Do what feels right for you. There is always debate in the scene about what a real Domme is or isn’t (which you can read about more in my blog post here). While, yes, I do believe a Domme must know the basic art of domination – the tools and the medium in which she does this is up to her. As long as you take the time to study the art and explore it for yourself while playing safely and consensually you are a “real Domme”. You don’t have to offer real time, cam, clips, etc if those things don’t interest you.

Use social media sparingly. While this goes for anyone since we know too much exposure to social media can be detrimental to our health, I cannot emphasize this enough for Dommes. While I use social media myself for promotion and to network with other women, I have found myself much better off focusing on building my empire off social media.

When I started I used to tweet a lot of photos and teasers which for me only brought me a lot of guys looking for free fap material and attention. I also would frequently get into pointless debates which would drain the energy that could have been better placed working on my own business. Again, balance is key and finding what works for you.

Gift cards don’t pay your bills or add to savings. While it’s tempting to play into the game of who has the highest amazon balance, ultimately gift cards can’t pay your bills or be added to your retirement fund. When I first began Femdom, I often accepted gift cards for sessions which became unsustainable.

While I get that Femdoms and Findoms aren’t supposed to “need” the money, however many do this as their job. We all “need” money to live, and giving subs time, attention, and sessions is work. That is why gifts are meant to be just that with me – gifts.

This is all an illusion, don’t take yourself and others too seriously. Most of Femdom is about having a larger than life Goddess persona. Do not assume this means you actually have to believe you are above others. At the end of the day, we are presenting a fantasy which can involve exaggeration at times. Remember that we are all human and these are just the roles we play to escape reality for a bit.

Again, these are all things that have applied to me personally. Obviously, if you don’t agree with something you don’t need to take my advice… try it for yourself.

MSC

 

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *