How Not to Approach an Online Dominatrix and What You Can Do Instead

     So, you see the perfect Domme Goddess of your dreams and desperately want to serve and/or have a session with her. All your fantasies of what could possibly happen in her presence scatter around your brain making it difficult to resist contacting such divine perfection immediately.

You need to serve her RIGHT NOW so she can put you in your place and make you her obedient little slave. You open up a new message to this beautiful albeit intimidating lady with the majority of your brain functioning out of your pants and get a less than desirable response from her (or not even a response)… leaving you still horny and now a little confused.

I get it. You get so excited and just can’t help yourself. I mean how is a grown horny man supposed to control himself in front of such a temptress??? Now I am not so naive as to think that guys aren’t coming to me (Ha!) to get off in some way. Even if it may be just mentally. That still doesn’t excuse idiotic behavior.

I have compiled a list of behaviors I have found to be unproductive in seeking a rewarding exchange with an online Dominatrix (whether that be phone/ cam sessions, tasks, service, etc) and what you can do instead to gain a better response from the Goddess of your dreams.

Sending a book’s worth of text about your fetishes

Most likely if you are searching for a pro dominatrix who charges for her services, she is not going to waste her time reading your laundry list of fetishes unless you are paying her. As far as I see it, the moment you start getting off on your own fetishes is when the meter starts rolling.

What you can do instead:

Send a small tribute along with your email if you feel so inclined to send one. It doesn’t have to be huge, but I guarantee making some form of effort may make the difference between your email being read and it being thrown into the trash bin.

 

Asking for services the Domme clearly states she doesn’t offer

Now I know that I have often added and removed select services I offer during my time of being a pro Domme. However, I try to do my best updating my websites with what I currently have to offer clients and subs. I have no problem with people asking me questions about my services as sometimes I know things can be missed when I go through changes and updates. I do, however, have a problem with prospective subs and clients trying to change my mind and over step my stated boundaries that I clearly set. Trust me, I know what manipulation looks like – Obviously.

What you can do instead:

Do your best to research the Domme you would like to engage. Respect her boundaries and protocol when she doesn’t want to offer you a specific service just because you think you are an exception to her rules. Search for someone who does offer what you want (unless what you want is delusional, excessive, and/ or dangerous and nobody wants to offer it… then you’re SOL, buddy!)

 

Saying you want to serve when you’re just really looking for a fetish/femdom role play session

I know not every man coming to me for my services wants to be a slave and that’s ok. That is why I offer phone/ cam sessions, make clips, sell tasks, etc. However, I find many guys love to act like they want to be my slave when in reality they are looking for a service to get their rocks off. Many seem to hope I’ll cut them a deal since they are offering their servitude upfront in the form of verbal diarrhea. Nope.

What you can do instead:

Be honest. If you really wanted to be of service you would simply send a tribute instead of trying to initiate role playing before having to pay for a Domme’s time. Have some integrity, schedule a session or call my phone lines if you just want to play out the fantasy of servitude. Either way, you usually have to pay for play.

 

Proposing a long term relationship / asking to be instantly owned

This one seems like common sense, but as we all know, common sense is not so common. Good luck approaching any woman seeking immediate life commitment right off the bat – not to mention a pro dominatrix who is running a business. I personally do not seek to own slaves much anymore for this very reason. And even if I did, I would prefer to get to know the person first anyway.

What you can do instead:

Unfortunately, if you have this mentality, the only thing that can save you is pulling your head out of your ass.

 

Demanding “xyz” NOW

I don’t know a single pro Domme who sits around all day 24/7 in sexy clothing and full make-up waiting for men to submit. I don’t like to assume, but you can bet most of us actually have lives outside of being powerful Goddesses and cannot serve your fantasies 24/7. Call me crazy, but I thought we were here to be served and to demand things from subs and slaves – not the other way around.

What you can do instead:

Realize that a Dominatrix is a person just like you and cannot simply do xyz for you at a moment’s notice whenever you are horny. In fact, that’s not really a good way to go about getting anything from anyone ever, so I suggest rethinking one’s manners and strategy. Learn to be more patient and respectful of someone so gracious to even offer these things for you in the first place.

 

Now I hope you’ve learned a few things about how to properly approach a online dominatrix… and if you didn’t, you will most likely be referred back to this post. When you take the time to do your research, you will have a much more fulfilling experience.

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